Girls’ Night Out

It finally happened.

And I don’t want to lose it.

Girls’ night out……with no questions asked.

Not that there needs to be questions asked, mind you, I’m just making a point. Probably making the point more to myself than anyone else, because we all do remember that this is my free therapy session, right?

I have plenty of friends, I think. Friends from various facets of life, each group a cog in the wheel that keeps me going. Some girls come, some go, some for one season, some for several seasons, though not always concurrent. That’s how life is, isn’t it? And as soon as we stop stressing over it, the happier we become. Let the friendships ebb and flow and they’ll be there when you most need them, and you’ll be there for when they most need you. No need to force anything, as it’s as natural as nature can be. Relax in it and enjoy.

And that’s just what I’m finally able to do.

I feel like in years past I’ve been a friend of convenience, and I’ve had friends of convenience because it was, well,  convenient. Don’t take me wrong, I’ve loved each and every friend I’ve had, whether deep conversations happened, or scratched surface being where we kept it. For the most part my friends have been my oldest friends from school, my friends from church, and my clients. That’s kind of been the pool in which I’ve swum. I’ve had dear, dear people whose paths I’ve crossed because of those venues, and I am forever grateful and hopeful that they’ve felt the same toward me.

But until just a handful of years ago I never had the free-flowing, happy, easy, see-you-later-I’ll-be-home-when-I-get-home freedom. I do now, and I’m over the moon.

I was always jealous of the girls who had a friend group and got to have Girls’ Night Out. I never understood how they pulled that off. Dinners out, card games at someone’s house, quick weekend get-aways. I was always so perplexed. They had jobs, kids, responsibilities, and yet had the ability to go have a good time. I sat back and wondered.

Wondered whether I was just not a good enough friend. Wondered if I had some flaw that kept me from being invited. Wondered how they had husbands who let them do this. Lots and lots of wonder. So I eventually just gave up on the whole idea. Oh, I tried to participate a few times over the years, but I’d come home and it would never end well. And that’s all I’ll say about that. So I just gave up.

Now, that’s not to say I didn’t have relationships with females, but what I found was that being a Mama to youngers was more acceptable to the people I lived with than hanging out with girls my own age. So that’s what I did. I immersed myself in the young ladies at church and did my dead-level-best to nurture them along. They gave me a purpose, a place, and a no-questions-asked opportunity to have girl time. This fed me for quite a few years, and I miss those young ladies terribly. They’ve all grown up, have families of their own, careers, different cities, different lives. I’m so thankful for social media where I can still see snippets of their well-being and know they’re o.k. I love them all very much.

But time marches on and that season came to an end and a new season bloomed and has the most wonderful fragrance. You see, I’ve been given a freedom I never had, opportunities I never thought I’d get to take part in. Women have come into my life and I into theirs and what was lacking for so many years is now fat with fruition. I still have my old school friends and we’re closer than ever. Our kids are grown and flown, and we’re all a little more settled in life, so we have the ability to make time for one another, and we do just that. It’s now a completed full-circle fifty-plus year tapestry weaving that has many more years of thread to add. These girls know me oh so well, and seem to love me anyway. We’ve taken beach trips, gone to dinner, and stay in touch weekly, even if it’s just stupid memes traded back-and-forth. It’s a solid foundation, full of memories and forward dreams. I don’t ever want to live without them.

But that’s not all there is. There’s more. And I’m so happy about it. When I married and moved in with The Lawyer, he owned a home in a small neighborhood and over the last few years I’ve gotten to know my neighbors. Wonderful people who live quiet, relaxed lives, full of love and warm hugs. The ladies who surround me are the sweetest bunch, full of laughs and sarcasm, who stand beside each other literally and figuratively. We have dinner, take walks, text at all hours, share grandkid photos – all the things good friends do. When I go to dinner with them I’m never scolded for coming in later than expected. Never interrogated about conversations. Never chided for who, where, when. I get to have girlfriends who are my age or older, and I get to relax when I’m with them. I get to relax.

I can’t live without my life-long friends, as they are my roots. And now I can’t live without my neighborhood friends, as they are fresh blooms. Thanks, girls, for keeping me around. I appreciate and love you all ❤️